Understanding what its all about

I was never really a competitive person in my younger years.  Main reason why is that I really didn’t have much athletic ability.   So while I ran cross country, wrestled, and ran track in high school, I never really was a great athlete.  When I started playing hockey back in 1997 for the first time, little did I realize just how competitive I was.  I went from not being able to skate or play to where I am today.  Even now, I am not the best goalie, but I have made huge strides.  I understand that I will never be the best in the leagues I play in, but I am ok with it.  This is why I called this post, “Understanding what it’s all about” because playing hockey is about having fun.

In the past, I remember losing out in playoffs or losing a big game and being so upset with myself.  On the flip side, if we won a big game I was all pumped up.  These swings came every game, which really wasn’t healthy for me in the long term.  Back about 2 years ago, after I won my first ice hockey championship, I decided to not live on the edge like that anymore.  Today, it is harder to keep that promise to myself.  That competitive fire still has not left me.  I still have the desire to win.  If I don’t win my last game of the season, its a failure, or so I tell myself.  Why I keep going back to the watering hole (so to speak) is tough to answer.  Maybe I will never be rid of the competitive bug entirely.

So while I understand the meaning of rec league sports, and I enjoy playing, its tough to separate the two.  Today, a full week after our finals loss, I am still a little disappointed in the end result.  I still think that I could have played better which would have resulted in a win.  I still think that it was an opportunity lost.

I still have 2-3 weeks before the start of the new season.  Longest break ever.