You want your computer fixed?  Here is my new rate structure.

Friend: Case of Corona or Heineken
Neighbor: Dinner out and a Case of Corona or Heineken
Relative you like: Case of Corona or Heineken
Relative you dont like: 2 Cases of Corona or Heineken
Person you dont know: $75/hr.
Person you dont know, but really would like to get to know: $50/hr.
Wife/Spouse: Sexual favors
Boss: $50/Hr.
Ex-Boss: $175/Hr.
Your Car/Motorcycle Mechanic: IOU = to number of hours worked to trade for his time when your car breaks.
Cow-Irkers from work: $75/Hr
Annoying Cow-Irkers: $125/Hr
People I work with that are good to me: $50/Hr