When I started this blog, I wanted to keep close tabs on hockey. With my knees in pain on a daily basis, especially after playing hockey, I wanted to be able to go back and remember everything. After I started the gel injections I knew I would be able to keep playing for a lot longer than I anticipated. Back in 2014, I lost interest in keeping track. Blogging because of the fact that I saw the end coming was no longer a consideration.
I had an occasional drive to write again, but I just put it out of my mind. To be honest, I really did miss it. I know I won’t be able to catch up everything in one blog post, but the last couple years have been a really wild ride.
So many games that they all blend in with each other.
So many opportunities won and lost.
So many great teammates.
So many great teams.
I am starting out fresh this week after coming up short in two championship games. Its a bitter pill to swallow, and I wonder just how many kicks at the can I am going to have at achieving a championship. Then, I remember how many great teams I have been a part of. I remember winning so many championships in the last 18 years that I have lost count of them. I go back and look at the pictures and then realize that its not even a complete gallery. I should be thankful for all the opportunities I have had instead of being upset at the ones I have just missed on.
I know, its rec league hockey. Beer league hockey shouldn’t matter. It should be having a good time with your teammates. It should be having a beer after the game with your team after a very satisfying game. I do have fun doing those things, but that competitive fire still burns inside me. I can’t shake it, and when I come up short in a game, its upsets me. It drives me to get better.
Writing in this blog about losing a championship game is tough. Its tough to start talking about the end result. I go through in my mind how great it would be to win the league championship with the team you have played with for 15-20 games. Its a long season after all. Then, when its over and you come up short, there is an empty feeling. Its one that is going to stick with me for a couple days, or at least until the new season starts.
Worst of all, I don’t like to make excuses. Could I have been a little better than I was? Absolutely. It never falls on my team to do better, but on me to do better. The mistakes I make are amplified over the missteps of my team. I guess that is what fuels me to play better.
I really cannot wait for the new season to start in a couple weeks. Until then, lacrosse reffing and working out in preparation for the Tough Mudder in September will be my motivation.